Oftentimes, as mothers, we make our own grand designs in our heads. We have all the plans. We’ve thought through all of the contingencies. We have all of the details laid out. Then, we sit on our mama throne, in our own little motherhood kingdom, and watch the plans unfold–
Directing paths, giving instructions, and keeping everyone on task. When all is well, great. What a happy day. But, when things don’t work out the way we’ve planned, attitudes get sour, tempers get short, and patience runs thin.
Oh, that’s just me?
Ok.
Motherhood is one of the greatest joys we’ll ever have the privilege of experiencing. It also provides us with one of the greatest opportunities to misplace our position of authority if we aren’t careful. In other words, motherhood can be done for the glory of God, or for the glory of ourselves.
It’s a thin line to tread and it’s easy to step on the wrong side. At the end of the day, as mothers, we need to ask ourselves, are we building the Lord’s kingdom, or ours?
Our Kingdom, or His?
We can’t be too careful about where we place our focus, sister. The Lord has called us to be mothers, and it’s such an important job. Great tasks call for great responsibility, especially when it comes to the little lives we have charge over.
There are so many things to do in the area of motherhood, right? Sometimes it can be hard to keep the main thing, the main thing. The Lord, in His wisdom, His care, and His love calls us to seek Him first. He knows the number one thing we need is Him, or nothing else makes sense. When we do keep Him in first place, it’s much easier to keep the right perspective.
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Without Him as our main focus, we can easily get busy building our own kingdom while we let God’s kingdom fall to the waste side. Our rules, our objectives, our plans, and our purposes. We can think what we’re doing with our kids is building God's kingdom, but sometimes we’re simply making sure our own little kingdom is in proper order.
As mothers, we can become comfortable within our own walls and in our own heads. So much so, that our comfortability traps us in a state of disobedience.
Yes, even if we’re doing all the right things, all the spiritual disciplines, and partaking in all the biblical parenting advice we can find. Within all of these wonderful practices, we can still be too busy maneuvering through our kingdom to be obedient.
A Lesson from the Book of Haggai
I love diving into some of the lesser-referenced books of the Bible; the book of Haggai is one of them. There are some powerful truths we can find when we take the time to study the Word and inquire of the Holy Spirit for wisdom and understanding of the message being conveyed.
Haggai was a prophet in the days when the Jewish exiles returned home after 70 years of captivity in Babylon. God used him to encourage the people to stop being complacent and comfortable in their own homes, and instead get back to rebuilding the Temple.
They needed some motivation because priorities were a little out of whack. They were focused on themselves, their own lives, and their own agendas. They labored, ran their households, and provided for their families– indeed, they weren’t idle. Yet, they weren’t doing the main thing. They were comfortable in their own little kingdoms, you could say.
Sound like anything we just talked about?
I love the Lord’s instruction to the people:
“Thus says the Lord of hosts: “Consider your ways!” ”
It’s as if the Lord is calling out: Wake up. Pay attention. Think about what you’re doing!
Is it our work, or the Lord’s work? And, even if it is for the Lord, is it what He is actually calling us to do right now, in His timing, in His way?
Kingdom Building with a Badge of Busyness
Let’s consider our ways, fellow mama.
We can inadvertently put on our badge of busyness, too physically and mentally frantic taking care of our own world to focus on what the Lord has for us. All of our sights can be set on the short-term aspects of our lives— so much so that we give very little thought to what matters long term.
You see, as mothers, we can live a life for the glory of God. We can wipe noses, change diapers, and cook meals for the glory of God. We can, and we should do all things for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 13:31).
However, sister, we should be mindful to not get lost in all of those things. Can we tend to these immediate needs without losing sight of what the Lord is calling us to do for His kingdom, big picture? Because I don’t know what you, but these immediate needs– albeit tending to them does show Christ’s love to our families– leave me exhausted by the end of the day. Sometimes, as I’m living a life focused on the daily tasks, I’m left with very little energy to set my sights on the Lord’s kingdom. It’s all about my kingdom and how I want it to run.
Maybe that’s how the people of Haggai’s day felt.
Unchecked Priorities
The Lord called for a drought on all the labors of the Jewish people’s hands (Haggai 1:11) because they did not have their priorities straight. Their walls were beautiful and comfortable, while the Lord’s Temple was left unfinished. They were focused on themselves and not the Lord.
Their priorities were not in their proper place– but not just their priorities. In fact, they lacked the fear of the Lord.
Yet, once the people feared the Lord (their reverence was in the proper place), the Lord stirred them to continue their work on the temple (Haggai 1:12-14). As Proverbs shares, we need to begin with the fear of the Lord; it is the beginning of wisdom and knowledge (Proverbs 1:7). It is the start of our trust in and obedience to God.
When we’re on our thrones, we want our children to fear us and do what we say; we want them to revere us. Until we step down from our fabricated throne, there’s no room for the Lord to be on the throne in our hearts and our households.
Kingdom Building the Better Way
And, sister, as we enter into the realm of doing the Lord’s work and will for His glory– not ours– He is faithful to step alongside us (Haggai 2:4).
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We see this as the Jewish people in Haggai’s day began working on the Temple again. They had to leave the comfort of their homes and jettison their own priorities in order to be faithful to what the Lord wanted them to do NOW. In doing so, the Lord promised that the new Temple would be one far greater than the former; more glorious. He promised it would provide a place of peace (Haggai 2:9).
Like those God called to focus on rebuilding the Temple, we too have to give up our own agendas and be mindful that we’re carrying out the Lord’s. It may be scary. It may be exhausting. It may be so much more uncomfortable than the way we’re running our household now. But, sister, the Lord promises that His way will be one that brings peace.
His way for our families will be better than anything we could do solely through the labor of our own hands.
Put Your Reverence in the Right Place: Free Psalms Bible Study
Dive deeper into the Word and focus on God’s tremendous love for you in your motherhood journey with this 16-page Bible Study. You’ll take a look at Psalms that shout God’s faithfulness, call you to praise Him louder, and trust Him more deeply.
Warning: For the Glory of God…or Not?
At one point, the Lord prompts Haggai to ask the priests about how things become holy, unclean, and defiled. They respond by basically saying that things do not become holy merely by touch or by being in a specific place. Yet, things can be defiled by touch or presence. (Haggai 2:11-14).
What does this have to do with us– those of us who are children of God, living under grace, in Christ?
Follow me, sister. We can easily think that all is well and good in our house because we are a Christian family, or because we say we live a lifestyle that is biblical. We’re doing family devotions, quiet times before the Lord, going to church, and being mindful to train up our children biblically.
Yet, if we’re just going through the motions, doing our duties with hearts that are absent of surrender unto Him, things are not all well and good. If we aren’t being obedient to the Lord daily, yielding and submitting to His will for our lives– in the big and little things– dare I say that our disobedience “defiles” us.
It may look like we’re living for the glory of God, but really, it’s a façade because something is missing– obedience.
Our disobedience, be it ever so subtle, puts us in a position where we’re at odds with the Lord, going against His grain. The labor of our hands is not an acceptable sacrifice to Him. Or, perhaps we are walking in step with His plans, but our attitude is sour and we’re grumbling; unfortunately, that’s not a good look either!
Obedience—physically and by way of the attitude of our hearts— is better than sacrifice (1 Samuel 15:22).
But, praise God, sister, that we can please the Lord! We have the ability. Through the power of the Holy Spirit working within us, our desires can line up with the Lord’s; we can willingly surrender our throne to Him; and we can delight in Him. Motherhood can be done for the glory of God alone– by God’s grace. Let us not lose heart.
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How do we consider our ways?
When we consider our ways and are mindful to be obedient to the Lord, He will bless us. We’ll see changes in our lives and the lives of our families. But first, we need to take an honest look to determine whose throne is in our household.
Is our motherhood being lived out for the glory of God? Let us consider our ways with 7 reflective questions:
Is there an abundance of peace in our households, or continual strife?
How upset do we get when our children don’t obey every little thing?
Do we see times of disobedience as teachable moments or strictly as our children’s failure to fall in line?
Are we spending difficult moments in prayer or in frustration?
How often do we ask for the Lord’s wisdom?
Is our to-do list so pressing that it leaves no room for the Spirit’s promptings to direct us throughout the day?
Do our children understand that in parental obedience they are learning to obey the Lord? Or does the buck stop with us?
Are we willing to let God overthrow our kingdom?
He will, sister, and it’ll be for the better. Just because we aren’t sitting on our thrones anymore, doesn’t mean we have no authority. God placed us as mothers in our households and He still has important work for us to do. He simply wants us to yield to Him as the ultimate Ruler, not to hold all the power in our own hands.
Shall we let our kingdoms fall and His rise? I believe so. His is more glorious. And in His kingdom, there is peace.
More in motherhood
+Free Bible Study Printables+ Making time for God as a busy mom isn’t always the easiest thing to do. But, studying God’s Word is one of the most important things we can do to cultivate a deeper relationship with the Lord. Learn the key to spending more time with God, as well as 22 TIPS to help you consistently get in the Word each day.