Take a moment and recall something someone said to you as a child that you still remember today. Remember the words and how they made you feel. Think about where you were, approximately how old you were, and who said it. Do you have the mental picture?
I bet you do. I also would guess that the words you heard were either extremely hurtful or amazingly encouraging.
How do I know that? Because we tend to remember– long after the incident has passed– words spoken that had a strong impact on our emotions, thoughts, and being.
Both hurtful and encouraging words do that.
We have the ability to do both in the lives of those around us— to either encourage one another or cause pain.
God has given us the ability to put off our old selves, which are filled with corruption through our evil desires, and instead walk in newness of life– a new life created in the likeness of God, exhibiting true holiness and righteousness (Ephesians 4:22-24).
When our minds are renewed by Christ and we allow Him to guide our thoughts and tongues, it is easier to encourage one another.
But, it is just as easy for us to allow our flesh to take over and do harm with our words. For when we relinquish the power of Christ in our minds for a moment, the power of our tongue, backed by our innate deceitful desires, takes over. Even if it’s just for a moment, we may end up speaking a phrase that will be remembered for years to come.
Power of the Tongue
Our words matter. That likely comes as no surprise to you. Since childhood, we’ve heard the rhyme, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” I know the ultimate goal of this elementary teaching is to not let others’ words affect us so much and to learn how to not take things too personally.
But the truth is, words can, in fact, do hurt us.
Our tongues are a powerful little thing. They have the ability to speak deceit and evil (Psalm 34:13), or speak justice, and wisdom (Psalm 37:30), and tell of the Lord’s righteousness (Psalm 35:28).
Good vs. evil. Both are available in this small part of our body.
Our words have the power to tear down, build up, inspire, and belittle. With over 100 references in the Bible about the tongue and its capabilities, what makes us think that words hold no power and can never hurt us?
Sister, one of the facets of pursuing righteousness comes in the form of being mindful of the things we say. As believers, the Lord calls us to be uplifting and encouraging in our speech (Ephesians 4:29). To think we have no control over whether we do so is blindness.
What does the Bible say about encouragement?
It’s important to understand what the Word of God commands us not to do, but we cannot stop there. Knowing what the Bible says about encouragement and how we use our words gives us a basis for how we’re to conduct ourselves. And, using that knowledge, it’s our job to walk out that instruction day to day.
For example:
“Let no unwholesome word come out of your mouth, but if there is any good word for edification according to the need of the moment, say that, so that it will give grace to those who hear. ”
This verse is a go-to in terms of our speech. Not only does it tell us what not to do, but it also sums up beautifully how we should talk as believers.
In those moments when a thought pops into our heads and we’re contemplating whether or not to share it, we can come back to Ephesians 4:29 and ask ourselves,
Is this a corrupt or unwholesome thing to say?
Will it honor the Lord?
If I say it, will it encourage and edify those who hear?
Is this wasteful speech or will it fill a need at the moment?
Will it give any measure of grace?
we learn how to encourage one another from the Source
Encouragement is not a thoughtless and pointless gesture. Romans 5:5 says that God is the God of endurance and encouragement. If He is the God of encouragement, then know that encouragement is direct, precise, and purposeful, just as the Lord. It should be so as it manifests in our words and deeds as well.
The fact that He is the God of encouragement is good news for us! Although God uses us to encourage one another, we are not the source of the encouragement. We only need to look to Him, who He is, and all He has done.
There is encouragement in Christ (Philippians 2:1) — by the love He showed while living on earth, in His ultimate death on the cross, and through the power of His resurrection. When we allow these truths to permeate our being, we are filled with His encouragement and that is what we share with others.
“He who loves purity of heart, and whose speech is gracious, will have the king as his friend.
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I’ll say it again, sister— our words matter! Our conduct matters. Gracious speech that is based on His truth can turn even our greatest enemies into our friends and gives us the ability to gain the confidence of kings.
Barnabas in the Bible
Let me tell you about an often overlooked friend in the Bible. Acts 4:36 tells of a Levite man named Joseph, who the apostles called Barnabas. Barnabas means son of encouragement.
Barnabas is described as a good man, full of the Holy Spirit and of faith in Acts 11:24.
Shortly after Saul’s conversion to Christianity, Paul (formerly Saul) began preaching the name of Jesus. He came to Jerusalem where he attempted to join the disciples, but knowing Paul’s history of persecuting Christians, they were afraid of him. They didn’t believe that he truly was a disciple (Acts 9:26).
But, the son of encouragement steps in. Barnabas immediately went to Paul’s defense, personally bringing him before the disciples and sharing with them the details of Paul’s conversion and his preaching of the Word in Damascus thereafter (Acts 9:27). Barnabas, as a trusted brother in the Lord, was able to bridge the gap and alleviate the disciples' fear of this once-ruthless man.
The truth he shared about Paul encouraged the disciples enough that Paul then became one of their own— able to join them in preaching the name of Jesus in Jerusalem (Acts 9:28).
Barnabas’s encouragement cleared the confusion and promoted an atmosphere of peace amongst everyone involved.
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Encourage & Connect Like Barnabas
There is actually much we can learn from Barnabas in the Bible. Although Paul quickly becomes a highlighted character in much of the New Testament, Barnabas is steadily present in much of the book of Acts, playing what seemingly looks like a supporting role. Yet, there is so much to glean from the man who lives up to his name that helps us understand the capabilities that encouragement has.
Encouragement inspires others to “do”.
When he came and saw the grace of God, he was glad, and he exhorted them all to remain faithful to the Lord with steadfast purpose, for he was a good man, full of the Holy Spirit and of faith. And a great many people were added to the Lord. -Acts 11:23-24 ESV
Because of the encouragement the people received through the work of the Holy Spirit, many came to the Lord. Not only that but those who had already come to the Lord were exhorted to remain faithful to their calling and in their walk.
Encouragement inspires connections that carry out God’s purposes.
So Barnabas went to Tarsus to look for Saul, and when he had found him, he brought him to Antioch. For a whole year they met with the church and taught a great many people. -Acts 11:25-26 ESV
Barnabas knew how God wanted to use Paul, and he did things in his power to provide Paul with those opportunities. Bringing Paul to Antioch allowed the Christians there to be encouraged by the Word through Paul and Barnabas for an entire year.
Encouragement inspires others to encourage.
After the reading from the Law and the Prophets, the rulers of the synagogue sent a message to them, saying, “Brothers, if you have any word of encouragement for the people, say it.” So Paul stood up, and motioning with his hand said: “Men of Israel and you who fear God, listen.” -Acts 13:15-16 ESV
The rulers of this synagogue in Antioch undoubtedly knew the work Barnabas and Paul were doing. They’d been encouraged by it, and now, in turn, they sought an opportunity to pass that encouragement along firsthand to those who were in the synagogue that day.
Encouragement inspires others to seek the Lord.
And after the meeting of the synagogue broke up, many Jews and devout converts to Judaism followed Paul and Barnabas, who, as they spoke with them, urged them to continue in the grace of God. The next Sabbath almost the whole city gathered to hear the word of the Lord. -Acts 13:43-44 ESV
One of the most important purposes of encouragement is to inspire people to seek the Lord for themselves. Barnabas and Paul didn’t want the people to follow them; they wanted them to seek the Lord and have a yearning for His ways and His Word.
Encouragement emboldens the encourager.
And Paul and Barnabas spoke out boldly… -Acts 13:46 ESV
So they remained for a long time, speaking boldly for the Lord… -Acts 14:3 ESV
That fire within, that only comes from the Lord, burns fiercely when we let Him, as the God of encouragement, lead our steps and direct our words.
For so the Lord has commanded us… -Acts 13:47
They were willing to do what the Lord called them to do, no matter the reception, response, or persecution.
But they shook off the dust from their feet against them and went to Iconium. -Acts 13:51 ESV
They could withstand persecution from the Jews who were angry at them for preaching to the Gentiles, shake it off, and move on.
Encouragement brings comfort.
When you are naturally an encouraging person, the atmosphere you create permeates those around you. You don’t have to try or work hard. The Holy Spirit is powerful and is always bearing witness to the Lord and all He is. Through Him, you will bring comfort to those in your midst (Colossians 4:7-11), and uplift them during trials.
How to Encourage One Another: 5 Ways to Uplift
Let’s face it. The Bible calls us to encourage one another, so why not ask the Lord to help us do it in a way that He desires? Here are a few biblically-based tips:
#1: Rely on the Holy Spirit (Acts 11:24).
We see Barnabas was filled with the Holy Spirit and faith. We need to recognize and remember that we are not the source; we can rely on the Source to guide us.
#2: Encourage through the Word of God (Acts 13).
People are yearning to hear the truth of the Word, sometimes they just don’t know it. Once they receive the life and refreshment the Word brings, they’ll thirst for more (Acts 13:42). There is nothing wrong with general encouragement, but biblical encouragement based in the Word is influential.
#3: Take encouragement with you everywhere you go (Acts 15:31).
Even when you’re delivering news or truths that are tough to understand and swallow, you can still leave those around you encouraged. Be mindful of your words, tone, and body language; even correction can bring the fresh air of encouragement.
#4: Be a faithful friend.
Not only did Barnabas initially defend Paul as a new believer and connect him to the Church, but he also stuck by Paul’s side, traveling with him on many missionary journeys. Travel the miles with a friend. Go through trials together, encourage others together, and encourage one another.
#5: Seek the Lord in whom you should encourage.
There are things happening in others’ lives that you may not be aware of. They may be facing hard tasks (Deuteronomy 3:28), struggling to make a decision, or wrestling with instruction from the Lord. Even if you have no idea why you are to bring encouragement to them, if the Lord tells you to, do so. Ask Him for the words to speak— if the words are from Him, they will always match up with the circumstances they’re facing.
Encouragement for you, My Sister!
May the God of encouragement, the One who sustains us, guides us, and cares for us provide eyes to see all He really is. May He allow you to see clearly the things He is doing in your life, and give you wisdom and discernment to know what to do in every moment.
You are a daughter of the Most High King, chosen, beloved, and blameless in His sight due to the blood of Christ.
You carry within you an incorruptible beauty that can’t fade away.
You have a purpose and He has given you the knowledge, skills, and talents to carry it out according to His will.
You are wonderfully made and all of your value is wrapped up in who He is, not what you do.
May you be strengthened by the Lord and His might all the days of your life.
RELATED: Find more encouragement straight from the Word in the BRIEF NOTES OF ENCOURAGEMENT series:
